Stupid Boy

Well, she was precious like a flower
She grew wild, wild but innocent
A perfect prayer in a desperate hour
She was everything beautiful and different
She laid her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't
Stupid boy, stupid boy

So what made you think you could take a life
And just push it, push it around?
I guess to build yourself up so high
You had to take her and break her down

Well, she laid her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't

You stupid boy, oh, you always had to be right
But now you lost the only thing
That ever made you feel alive

It took a while for her to figure out
She could run but when she did
She was long gone, long gone

Wishing

So I've been thinking lately about all the things that I've been wishing for in my life...For example, I wish I lived in a place where seasons actually occurred. California take note, this is what fall is supposed to look like. This week you are doing a better job at it than before but can we keep it up, Please?

I've also been wishing that I was in God's word more than I have been. It seems that I get so caught up in the little things in life and I just push Him aside. I think "Oh I'll read my Bible tonight" or "I'll get up early and do it tomorrow morning" but as you can probably tell this becomes a vicious circle and nothing ever gets done. I am trying to pray to Him everyday that I will grow stronger in Him and make it a desire of mine to wake up starving for His Words and Guidance. 

I've also been wishing (and this is really selfish of me but I can't help it) I would find someone that is just out of this world, perfect, one-of-a-kind, most Godly and humble servant of the Lord, loving, generous, handsome, funny, and courageous. Sad to say I'm still in this dreamland waiting by my window, looking for my knight in shining armor to come riding in on his white horse and sweep my off my feet. In 20 years it still hasn't happened, almost but that turned out to be the devil in disguise. I know God has a wonderful plan for me and has someone waiting in the wings that will come when I fully trust in God to put him in my life but can you give me some Lord, if you could give me some assurance that he is coming that would be great. Even just a little nudge in the right direction so I don't miss him that'd would be helpful too. 

This is would be my ultimate dream come true if David Beckham came riding up one day but he is married so I'll settle for the next best thing (my future husband, wherever you are)

I've been dreaming to about my family and how great it would be if we all were the picture perfect family that got along and had no issues whatsoever. We all would gather in this Norman Rockwell like painting and have a real Thanksgiving, sharing and eating together and just praising God that we all had everything we needed, each other. I know I am incredibly blessed with the family I have despite our craziness (which I know every family has) but sometimes year after year the same grouchiness and unkind attitudes that I see from everyone gets pretty old. 

So for now I'll keep wishing and praying that God will take these dreams and make them what He wants them to be. I'll keep trying to remember that this wishing only gets me so far. I actually need to put in some hard work if I want to make these dreams come true.